Hi! So yesterday I had to go to court. It was for something stupid done when I was hypo-manic. SO out of character for me. Anyhow that's not really the story. There were a billion people there (well 75 cases) and they went alphabetically. Lets just say I'm one of the last 8 or so numbers in the alphabet.
So I'm sitting there anxious out of my mind, twisting my fingers, scratching my neck, biting my nails. All the normal freak out things for me. This older woman she was probably about 65 reached over and patted my hand. "It'll be alright sweetie" she said. She then rubbed her hand across my back a couple times and patted my shoulder. It reminded me so much of my grandma. I got tears in my eyes and thats when I realized she was wearing my grandma's perfume.
My grandmother and I were SUPER close. I was the first grandchild. I was her shopping buddy, her laying around watching tv buddy. I lived with her a couple of times during my early adult years. Both for her and me to be honest. She was the one who convinced me to see a doctor about depression and anxiety when I was 18. She understood me and I understood her. She was so kind hearted. She gave people almost unlimited chances and forgiveness for their mistakes. I loved her so much. I was there with her when she died. I laid on her hospital bed and held her while her body gave out on her. I told her I loved her and I know she loved me.
So back to court. This woman was so sweet. It was like God sent me my grandma for that afternoon. Everytime I would start to tense up and get really anxious she would reach over and rub/scratch my back (just like my grandma always did) and whisper "it will all turn out fine." Their name must have been after mine because she was still there when they called me up and gave me a deal that basically made it so the record of the crime wouldn't exist as long as I behaved myself for 2 years (which of course I will.) When I turned around after dealing with all that she was beaming. I leaned over as I walked out of the courtroom and whispered "thank you so much for your kindness and support you will never know how much it meant to me." She said "no thanks needed and I'm glad everything turned out so well for you sweetie." I went and dealt with everything that needed to be done paperwork wise and just marvaled at the wonderful gift I had been given.
On a day with so much potential for bad sucky things...I got a little bit of my grandma. I know the woman wasn't my grandma but I could feel my grandma's presence there.
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